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Getting Started: Finding Your Full Truth and Inner Fre...

Getting Started: Finding Your Full Truth and Inner Freedom - Zainab Salbi

Truth has a fullness to it. If we want to hold it in its essence and in its entirety, we need to acknowledge all aspects of it, even the ones we do not like. This is no easy task, but if our intention is to truly sit on the throne of our lives, then facing ourselves is essential.

When we acknowledge our shadows, we will face all the feelings that we’ve locked up inside: all the embarrassment, desire, instability, anger, or whatever has been hidden for so long. As uncomfortable as it is for a time, we also free ourselves—because then we really own ourselves. We grow in the process, becoming an example of what is possible when we take ownership of ourselves and our lives.

To get you started on your journey to your full truth and inner freedom, consider these questions for reflection taken from my new book, Freedom Is an Inside Job. I also offer you a short video on befriending your darkness.

  • How have you hurt people in your life? What part of your personality inflicts this hurt? Can you look at this part of yourself directly, without giving excuses or justifications for what you do?
  • What do you dislike the most in people’s characters? What does such dislike trigger in you?
  • What if instead of pointing the finger at what you don’t like in others, you pointed the finger at yourself? What might you see if you did that?
  • What would it take to transform your own shadow? Not destroy it, but transform it. What are the incentives to change?
  • Can you show compassion to your own shadow? Can you use it to ignite certain positive actions and not get stuck or entrenched in it?

Zainab Salbi - Sounds TrueZainab Salbi is a humanitarian, author, and media personality. She’s been featured by CNN, MSNBC, Oprah, People, The Guardian, HuffPost, and more. Salbi resides in New York City. For more, visit zainabsalbi.com.

Buy your copy of Freedom Is an Inside Job at your favorite bookseller!

Sounds True | Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Indiebound

 

Give Yourself a 10-Day Tech Detox

 

This tech detox is a 10-day sneak peek of the full 30-Day detox plan offered in The Power of Off. Here’s how to use your phone as an opportunity to wake up instead of a source of constant distraction. Give yourself the gift of being truly present during the hectic holiday season.

DAY 1

Pay attention to and internally note every time you feel the impulse or hear the thought to check one of your devices or computer. When you notice this, ask yourself, “Am I checking out of habit?” and “Is this checking necessary right now?” (For example, is it necessary for work?) If the answer is “Habit” or “Not Necessary,” then repeat to yourself, “Stop” and do just that. Simultaneously, designate three times in the day when you are allowed to check your device, whether necessary or not.

DAY 2

Refrain from any tech use when socializing or otherwise interacting with people (except at work, if needed). This includes everyone—shopkeepers, waiters, and service people, as well as your family and friends.

DAY 3

Refrain from holding your device in your hand or keeping it in your pocket when it’s not in use. Store it out of sight elsewhere.

DAY 4

Refrain from using any of your devices during the first hour after you wake up in the morning. If your smartphone is also your alarm clock, treat it as such. Turn it completely off as soon as it’s sounded your morning wake-up.

DAY 5

Refrain from using tech devices during the last hour before you go to bed.

DAY 6

Turn off all alerts and notifications on your device. If your cell phone is your alarm clock, leave only the alarm notification intact.

DAY 7

Refrain from using your devices on public transportation or in taxis.

DAY 8

Write down four activities or experiences that nourish your spirit. Keep these simple and accessible—not the climbing-to-the-summit-of-Mount-Everest sort. Give yourself one of these experiences today, and get one on the calendar for each week to come. This practice should continue weekly after your detox as well.

DAY 9

Refrain from using your devices while waiting in line—any kind of line.

DAY 10

Refrain from using technology in the car, except when you need GPS assistance.

 

Looking for more great reads?

 

Excerpted from The Power of Off by Nancy Colier.

Nancy Colier is the author of The Power of Off. She is a psychotherapist, interfaith minister, author, and veteran meditator.

 

 

 

Write. Reflect. Dream: Recommended Reads

Content to Soothe the Soul of Your Inner Writer

 

Practice You by Elena Brower

From yoga luminary and artist Elena Brower, Practice You, is a sacred text of your own design.

Practice You is a map to your highest self; a field guide of your own creation. The pages of this Journal are full of potent prompts and inviting spaces, awaiting your contemplation and discoveries.

Within these pages you will find a series of Explorations, one for each of nine aspects of being.  Each exploration offers instructions and inquiries to help you design new attitudes, fresh perspectives, and stay on track with your intentions.

 

 

 

Writing as a Path to Awakening: A Year to Becoming an Excellent Writer & Living an Awakened Life by Albert Flynn DeSilver

Stories, dynamic meditations, and innovative writing exercises to spark creativity and spiritual awakening.

The best writers say their work comes from a source beyond the thinking mind. But how do we access that source? “We must first look inside ourselves and be willing to touch that raw emotional core at the heart of a deeper creativity,” Writes Albert Flynn DeSilver. In Writing as a Path to Awakening, this renowned poet, writer, and teacher shows you how to use meditation to cultivate true depth in your writing—so your words reveal layers of profound emotional insight and revelation that inspire and move your readers.

 

 

 

 

The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte

Your bucket list. Quarterly objectives. Strategic plans. Big dreams. Goals. Lots of goals and plans to achieve those goals—no matter what. Except …

You’re not chasing the goal itself, you’re actually chasing the feeling that you hope achieving that goal will give you.

Which means we have the procedures of achievement upside down. We go after the stuff we want to have, get, or accomplish, and we hope that we’ll be fulfilled when we get there. It’s backwards. And it’s burning us out.

With The Desire Map, Danielle LaPorte brings you a holistic life-planning tool that will revolutionize the way you go after what you want in life. Unapologetically passionate and with plenty of warm wit, LaPorte turns the concept of ambition inside out and offers an inspired, refreshingly practical workbook for using the Desire Map process:

 

Art of Attention by Elena Brower and Erica Jago

Yoga begins with physical well-being. But it can also transport us—through meditation, self-awareness, and movement—into a lifelong exploration of presence, elegance, and deeper life purpose. With Art of Attention, Elena Brower and Erica Jago show us the way. Distilled from their acclaimed workshops and training programs, this multifaceted book can be used as:

• A step-by-step workshop for merging movement-based mindfulness with traditional yoga

• A “tool kit” of asanas, meditations, self-inquiry questions, and healing practices for creating your own daily spiritual practice

• An uplifting source of visual beauty and wisdom teachings for inner reflection and elevation

 

 

 

Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg

Experience a modern classic on writing as you’ve never heard it before. With nearly one million copies of Writing Down the Bones in print, Natalie Goldberg has helped change the way writing is practiced in homes, schools, and workshops across America. Through her heartfelt personal reflections and her ingenious Zen-based exercises, Goldberg makes writing available to you as a tool for personal expression, self-exploration, and healing.

Goldberg offers new commentary about the creative, spiritual, and practical dimensions of writing. Join her as she looks back on her life, sharing the story of how her meditation studies with Zen master Katagiri Roshi inspired her to develop practices for “writing down the bones”: the essential, awakened speech of the mind. Here is a treasury of tested ideas, suggestions, and exercises that help new writers get started, and seasoned writers keep going.

 

The Writing Life by Julia Cameron and Natalie Goldberg

In The Writing Life, Cameron and Goldberg join forces for the first time in this revealing dialogue that speaks to our common search for an everyday spirituality.

Join these two creative giants as they explode cherished misconceptions about who should write, and why they should do it, opening the door to the writer’s world for everybody, not just a chosen few. Goldberg and Cameron take us inside their personal lives as committed writers and spiritual seekers, and explore the following questions: How can writing best be practiced? What is the difference between therapeutic writing and writing for publication? How do we conquer the twin dragons of mood and time? Is it dangerous or inspirational to dabble in different arts such as music, painting, and writing? How is addiction related to the writer’s life?

Edgy, surprising, and useful for its hard-won advice, The Writing Life is an invitation to a life-transforming act that requires no more than a pen, some paper, and the will to get started.

Living Wisdom with His Holiness the Dalai Lama

When you are in the presence of His Holiness the Dalai Lama, you are in the presence of compassion itself. But how many of us will have the opportunity to personally experience the man known as The Ocean of Wisdom?

Now, Living Wisdom gives you the chance to immerse yourself in the grace of His Holiness the Fourteenth Dalai Lama, and to receive the transformative power of his teachings in your own home.

The traveler of aloneness

A friend who regularly reads my personal blog asked if I would comment on what I saw as the difference between what she described to me as ‘loneliness’ and a related experience she referred to as ‘aloneness.’ Here is an excerpt of what emerged from our conversation…

At times, a very familiar sense of ‘loneliness’ can begin to color your world. You may wonder if it will ever go away, when it will yield to your deep longing for connection, and why all the work on yourself has not yet transformed the despair. The feeling of loneliness is a reminder of separation, and has a way of cutting into the aliveness of immediate experience.

The reality of ‘aloneness’, on the other hand, is translucent, in a way, and vibrantly alive. Despite your connection with others, you are asked to make the journey of the heart alone. No one can experience life for you, love and be loved for you, embrace and feel your tender heart for you, or die for you; likewise, you for them.

The traveler of aloneness is at home in this type of environment—and remains committed to it—knowing that organizing her reality around love will almost always trigger the experience of tender vulnerability and penetrating, transformative sadness. Living in the burning alive field of aloneness is so open, so unknown, and so unbearably touching; it is always uncertain and forever without ground or reference point. It reveals the truth that we can never fully look to the known to tell us who we are or anything certain about the nature of love. For love is of the unknown, infinitely creative, and emerging as a firestorm of grace in the radiant here and now.

Within the mandala of purifying aloneness, we know that at any moment our hearts may break, that we may fall in love in the most surprising way, that old dreams are sure to crumble, that what we thought we ‘knew’ *will* dissolve in front of our eyes, and that we *will* inevitably be asked to meet deep waves of feeling and sensation. As we commit to the very embodied path of the heart, only one thing is certain, really: that *everything* that has yet to be metabolized in our somatic environment will come on display, especially in intimate relationship, as it is seeking wholeness and integration.

There is a part of us that knows that as we open in this way, we will no longer be able to avoid the terror of intimacy, the surety of complete exposure, and the reality of crushing aliveness. We may realize that, without our conscious knowing, we have taken some forgotten vow to turn all the way into the preciousness of this life, willing to enter directly into such achy tenderness, into suffering, into penetrating melancholy, into the darkness, and into naked vulnerability—guided only by the unknown and by a love from beyond. It is not easy to live in such an open and unguarded way, but here we are: We have come here to give our hearts to others and to this world.

Though related, the experience of ‘loneliness’ is usually borne out of a resistance to our present experience—a subtle (or not so subtle) abandonment of feelings of grief, sadness, hurt, vulnerability, and shame. In our early environment, certain feelings were simply unsafe to touch, hold, and express—there was no true home made available for them. Because we are wired to do whatever we must to maintain the critical tie to our caregiving surround, we very intelligently and creatively chose to disembody and split off from these wild movements of fierce grace within. This was a very healthy, short-term strategy for a little boy or girl, yet here we are, several decades later, and burning to know the aliveness and mysteries of lover and beloved in this world.

When we are unable/ unwilling to meet these primordial companions—and are not able to stay with, hold, and metabolize them within our own somatic immediacy—we feel cut off from life, lonely, and disconnected. We yearn and long, at the deepest levels, to meet whatever guests appear in this sacred body, for we intuit that each is a special doorway Home. And we become lonely when we are not able to do so. It is the melting of these wounds and tangles that becomes the essence of the path of re-embodiment and opening the heart. The only way out is through; and the only way through is by love.

It is so bittersweet, really. Being an open-hearted human, who is always and eternally both broken and whole, can feel so fragile. Our old friends sadness, grief, jealousy, hopelessness, and raw vulnerability are so often sent away, out the back door of our hearts, and into a lonely forest. This is sad. Please, don’t go, friends! Stay close! Let us keep the door open to these ones, moment-by-moment crafting a warm home and safe refuge for the entirety of what we are. For in doing so, the path from loneliness to aloneness will become illumined, and we will provide safe passage for love in this world.

aloneness

 

A gift of pure rest

No matter how things are unfolding for you at this time, you can receive the secret transmission of the stars, the sun, and the moon: everything here is path, nothing is out of place, and no mistake has been made.

Though it may appear otherwise, you are not broken and are not in need of fixing. Your heart is being polished, your body is being washed clean, and waves of wholeness and integration are re-ordering your world.

Let go of the weary path of needing to change, to transform, to heal, to awaken, to be more spiritual, to be a better person, to accept everything, and to hold it all together. For just one moment, give yourself the gift of pure rest.

As you sink into the core of what you are, open to the breath as it moves in and out of your lungs. Allow your entire being to be infused with your commitment to self-kindness and to no longer abandon the wisdom-field of your immediate embodied experience, exactly as it is.

As things settle inside and around you, you may start to sense the movement of another substance within you, passing in and out of your heart. But, friend, this is no ordinary air. It is love. Come to end one world and to begin another. Please stay close.

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